Persuasive Principle #9: Law of Expectations

According to Kurt W. Mortensen, author of Maximum Influence, “The Law of Expectations uses expectations to influence reality and create results” (Mortensen 149). I feel that the Law of Expectations explains that people behave how we expect them to behave, and the more the persuader understands that, the more persuasive he/she will be. Before I knew what the Law of Expectations was I thought I never used it before, but I soon realized that I use it more than I originally thought. Although this law can be simple it is very effective in producing positive results for the persuader. Just the other day my sister was studying for her test and she was a little stressed out about it. To calm her down I told her that she will do great because she always does great; she truly is highly intelligent. I like to think that I was effective in persuading my sister because I understand now that I set an expectation for her. By telling her that she is great I think it motivated her to do well on her test because she wanted to live up to the expectation I set for her. I can be very effective when I use this law on my friends, family, and even strangers because you don’t really have to know a person to persuade them through this law. However, this law can easily backfire if you set expectations that are too high or low for someone to live up to. I would like to continue to use this law with a persuasive intention in mind and improve my ability to apply it effectively as the semester progresses.

From my early childhood to my teenage years I was always on some sort of baseball team. I loved playing baseball and had the constant desire to improve my game when I could. I used to take all of my games seriously while doing my best to perform on the diamond, but when my parents came to watch me it was a different story. Whenever my parents came to my games I was extremely motivated to be the best

player on the field. Thankfully my parents were at virtually every game I have ever played, so I was always motivated to play at a high level. However, my parents never told me that they expected me to be great because they wanted me to do my best and have fun. There was used to be a feeling inside of me which drove me to make my parents proud and show them that I was really good at playing baseball. It is almost as though I set expectations for myself that I had to live up to, driving me to be the player I wanted to be. Although it is a little hard to explain, but it is by them not having incredible expectations (like overbearing parents) for me made me set expectations for myself, in a good way. I persuaded myself to do everything that was required show them that their son was a good baseball player because it felt really good when I knew that I played well and they knew it too. Although they thought I played great even when I didn’t have a good game, their presence at my games persuaded me to be the best I could be.

As I stated in a previous blog, I work as a caddie at a golf course in the summer. My caddie master (my boss) uses the Law of Expectations all the time on all of his caddies in order to have us perform at a high level. Even though he knows that I want to perform my best and represent the country club in a positive manner he always give me a boost of confidence before I go out for a day’s work. He will usually tell me that I will do great because he knows how great of a caddie I am. I am always flattered by his kind words and they motivate me to live up to the expectations he set for me. So when I go out onto the course, with his words in mind, I go the extra mile in everything I do to show my boss that I am as great as he says I am. My boss is a genius for using this law because I never realized what he was doing until I learned about the Law of Expectations in my persuasive communications course. He is very effective in persuading me to do the best I can and be a great employee by setting those expectations for me. I really respect my boss for knowing how to motivate his employees through positive methods because he is a good person who wants everyone to succeed beyond expectations.

One week ago I saw one of the best movies I have ever seen throughout my life in Marvel’s Captain America: The Winter Soldier. I spent months waiting in great anticipation of this film because, as you should know by now, I love super hero movies. During those months I built up the expectations in my mind for how great the movie would be by watching trailers, actor interviews, and sneak peeks for the movie. I was so excited that I constantly told myself the movie will be amazing and it will blow my mind. To put my expectations higher, critics were saying that the movie was one of the greatest super hero movies they had ever seen. I had such high hopes and expectations for this movie that I can’t even put it into words. When I went to see the movie, somehow, it blew my expectations because it was even better than I could have expected. There is a possibility that I thought the movie was so good because I had very high expectations for it and I wanted it to be good so badly. But now, after I’ve viewed that epic film, all I want to do is continue to go to the theaters and watch it over and over again because I want to experience that movie blowing the expectations I had for it as much as I can; it was a good feeling. Through my expectations I persuaded myself that the movie was going to be amazing, and thankfully it was so much more.

In the past few days I have been given the opportunity to explore the Law of Verbal Packaging and how it can be used effectively in a nonverbal situation. As stated by Kurt W. Mortensen, “The Law of Verbal Packaging states that the more skill you are in the use of language and vocal techniques, the more persuasive you will be” (Mortensen 106). My professor recently assigned the class a project in which we have to write our mission in life on a piece of paper, take a creative picture of it, and tweet it. The purpose of this project is to see how persuasive we can be in persuading people to possibly attend Cardinal Stritch University through our mission statements. The way I write my mission statement, and tweet it, will be the determining factor in whether or not people are drawn to Stritch. I have not completed my project yet, but I am very interested to see how effective I can be in persuading people nonverbally through my mission statement. It will be a challenge because we humans are all so different and persuaded by different things. I plan to take as much from this project as possible and continue to learn how the Law of Verbal Packaging can be effective when applied to written pieces.

Persuasive Principle #8: Law of Balance

            As the author of Maximum Influence, Kurt W. Mortensen states, “The proper fusion of emotion and logic will speak to both the conscious and subconscious parts of the mind and increase your ability to persuade” (Mortensen 138). That is, the Law of Balance explains that in order to be an effective persuader, you must be able to use the proper amount of emotion and logic based on who you are trying to persuade. Whenever I’m trying to persuade someone I always put this law into effect. In order to persuade someone you have to explain to them why what you have proposed makes sense logically, as well as tie them in emotionally. But since every person on Earth is unique you need to be able to adjust the balance of how much logic and emotion you use on each person. Some people may be more persuaded by logic, others by emotion, and some want an equal amount of both. I use this law when I try to persuade my different professors, my parents, friends, and my sister. For example, most of my professors are more persuaded by logic when I try to convince them, while my parents want a balance of logic and emotion. More often than not I am effective when I use this law, but there are times when I’m unsuccessful because I used the wrong amount of logic and emotion. As the semester goes on I want to continue to strengthen my understanding of this law and how it can be used to its full potential. I have a good understanding of the Law of Balance now, but it never hurts to continue to improve and better yourself whenever you get the opportunity to do so.

            During my senior year of high school my cat Lilly had just turned two years old. I had noticed that she was sleeping more than usual and tacked on a few extra pounds, which is the nice way of saying she was becoming rather obese. She also didn’t have any motivation to get up and do anything because she was the only pet in the house. One day I saw that a kitten had been brought into the humane society and was just a couple of weeks old. To say the least she was precious and I fell in love with her as soon as I saw her picture. I saw that it was the perfect opportunity to get another cat not just to fulfill my need of having her, but to make life better for Lilly. I immediately approached my mother, who conveniently had the day off, and told her about the kitten. My mom was hesitant when I told her that we should buy another cat, but I was more than determined to get her to see things my way. As I pointed to an obese Lilly, who was sleeping on the couch, I told my mom that Lilly’s weight wasn’t a good thing. I explained to her that the weight she was carrying around couldn’t be good for her health, and my mother agreed. I used the power of logic to explain that healthier cats are happier cats, and an energetic kitten could solve that problem in an instant. The kitten would force Lilly to play and get her some more exercise, and she would be happy to have a new playmate instead of being alone all day. I topped off my persuasive attempt by telling my mom how happy she would be to have an adorable kitten running around and playing with anything she could get her paws on. The emotional side of my argument seemed to persuade her most because my mom loves adorable animals, so there was no question in her mind that she would love a new kitten. In the end I successfully persuaded my mother to adopt that kitten, her name being Lola, and she has successfully helped Lilly drop her weight. They play together all of the time and it is warming to watch them run around doing cat stuff. I’m glad I was able to effectively persuade my mother to adopt Lola through the Law of Balance.

            Last year my mom was contemplating putting my sister into a different school district because the one she was in no longer delivered a quality education. She was worried that my sister would miss her friends because despite the frustration of the declining education the school district offered, she enjoyed her plethora of friends. My sister didn’t mind going to another school, but she admitted that she would miss her friends. I felt that my sister should go to a different school because a quality education is the foundation to a successful future. I told my mom my opinion, when she asked me, and explained that her new school would not only offer a better education, but a good experience in the classroom would probably lead to new friendships. Not only did I explain that it was a logical choice in terms of education, but I included positive emotions by explaining that my sister will gain new friendships that will make her even happier. It was essentially a win-win situation at her new school and fortunately my sister was accepted into the new school she is currently attending. I like to think that I played some role in persuading my mom to make the choice she wanted to (thereby supporting her) because my sister is so happy at her new school, way more than any point at her old one, which makes me happy.

            Whenever I get the chance to go outside and play basketball on a warm summer day I take full advantage of that opportunity. Most of the time I will try to persuade my friends to come and join me play basketball. On the very, very rare occasions my friends aren’t in the mood to play basketball I persuade them to join me by using the Law of Balance. I use logic by explaining to them that playing basketball is good for their health and that getting fresh air is a great thing. I then use emotion by reminding them of the countless memories and good times we have had on the basketball court ever since we became friends; I try to explain that there is no way we won’t have fun. I’m almost always effective in getting my friends to come and play basketball because I am able to use the correct amount of logic and emotion when I attempt to persuade them.

            As the semester has progressed I am happy to say that I have been learning how to use the Law of Dissonance in a successful manner. According to Kurt W. Mortensen, “The Law of Dissonance states that people will naturally act in a manner that is consistent with their cognitions and commitments” (Mortensen 93). To stay with the tradition I have followed this entire semester, I have been testing my ability to use this law on the guinea pig known as my sister. The other day I saw that my sister was reaching for one of my favorite snacks, an apple, in the refrigerator. I don’t mind sharing things with other people, but when it comes to my fruit I’m a different person. When I realized what her intentions were as her arm stretched towards my apple I shot up from the couch and quickly approached her. I asked her what she was doing and she told me that she was getting a snack. With a look of betrayal on my face I asked my sister if she knew that I loved apples, and she replied yes. Then I asked her if she liked apples as much as me, and she knows I love fruit, and she told me that it was highly unlikely. I explained to her that I knew she liked chips way more than she liked apples and that it would be wrong of her to eat that apple when chips were available. She looked at the apple, handed it to me, grabbed some chips, and walked to her room. When I realized that I persuaded her I gave myself a fist pump because I was able to create enough pressure on her self-image so that she grabbed the chips instead of eating my apple to keep her actions in line with her beliefs. She reduced her dissonance by choosing the chips and once again my sister has helped my ability to use persuasive techniques grow.

Persuasive Principle #7: Law of Association

            As defined by Kurt W. Mortensen, author of Maximum Influence, “The Law of Association defines the mental triggers and anchors that will generate the right feelings, emotions, and thoughts to create a persuasive environment” (Mortensen 124). In other words, the Law of Association means that the more you are able to trigger positive emotions and feelings, the more successful you will be in creating a persuasive environment. Although I don’t use this law on a regular basis, I find myself using it on certain occasions in my life. I use it because it is an easy way to persuade people to do what you want them to do. Stimuli like smells, music, and symbols are powerful stimuli in evoking memories and triggering feelings in our minds (Mortensen 125-126). When you are able to trigger positive feelings through these stimuli, more often than not, people want to fulfill their need to experience those feelings again. If your solution allows the person to fulfill that need, the more persuasive you will be. It has been especially effective for me when I want to persuade my mother or sister, since they are the only ones I really use this law on. I love going to the movies, but sometimes my mom or sister don’t want to go; apparently they don’t share the same passion for cinema as me. In order to get them to go I will remind them of the smell of the popcorn, the sight of the giant screen, the feeling of sinking into one of their specialized chairs designed for maximum comfort, and the taste of the candy they love to eat. Most of their memories and feelings about the movies are positive, so after triggering said memories and emotions, we end up going to the movies. My goal is to learn how to use this law on other people that I don’t know, or have never met before. I feel like it would be hard to use the Law of Association on someone successfully if you have never met them before because you don’t know what triggers their positive emotions or memories. It would be a great tool to learn how to utilize this law on both people I’m familiar with and people who are strangers to me.

            My first example of the Law of Association in action is when I encounter products that are the color black. Black is one of my favorite colors and I have nothing but positive associations with it. One of the reasons for this is because I am a big super hero fan, whether it pertains to movies, comics, or video games.

The majority of my favorite characters wear the color black, and most of those characters are super villains. Whenever I see a product that is black I have to stop and consider if I should buy it or not, such as a blanket, a watch, socks, shoes, sunglasses, hats, and so on. When I see black products I always find myself reminiscing about the great times I had watching and reading about my favorite characters in super hero movies and comics that the wear the black which resembles evil. If a store is selling a product (small items, not cars or appliances) that is black they are bound to persuade me because I have the urge to buy it so I can experience those positive feelings and emotions as much as possible; I can maximize such experiences by buying the product. My positive associations with the color black explains why I prefer the night sky, why I have a black cat, why seventy-five percent of my wardrobe has some black in it, and why the background for this blog is black.

            An example of where the Law of Association is not so successful in persuading me is whenever I’m at a clothing store. I have very negative associations with clothing stores because when I was a child my mother always dragged me around everywhere she went, with the worst places being clothing stores. She would look around the store and shop for hours on end; we would arrive at ten in the morning and leave at one in the afternoon. My sister wasn’t born at the time so I was all by myself with my mom as she forced me against my will to shop at clothing stores with her. I disliked those clothing stores with an absolute passion and I still do to this day because of those experiences I had as a child. When I walk into a clothing store now the smell of fabrics, the sight of the endless sea of clothes, the bright lights, and the changing rooms put me in a sour mood because it reminds me of the negative experiences I had as a child. Just thinking about it right now, as I’m writing this blog, is making me quite uncomfortable. As you can probably guess clothing stores are extremely ineffective and unsuccessful in any attempt they have at persuading me. A given store could offer a “buy one get two free” sale and I still wouldn’t be interested because I have such a predetermined negative view about everything that clothing stores are. In all honesty, there is nothing that clothing stores could change or do to make me want to buy more clothes than necessary because the negative emotions and memories I associate with them will never change.

            Some of the fondest memories I have of my childhood involve the many times my dad and I went fishing. I cannot recall one bad time that I had as a child when I was holding a fishing pole in my hand. Every time my dad asked me if I wanted to go fishing I got butterflies in my stomach because I knew great times would surely ensue. I can still remember the smell of the baits, the sound of the line as I casted out, and the feeling of a fish biting my line. But before we could go fishing my dad and I always had to stop by the bait

store. As soon as we walked through the doors of that store a smell of everything that was fishing met my nostrils. It was like they took all of the baits and the fish and mixed them into the perfect smell that represented what fishing was. The experience was even better because the place they kept their bait gave off a sound that was identical to that of my dad’s live well (the container in the boat where you keep the fish). Those smells and sounds put my dad and I in such a great mood, which led us to always buy more than what we really needed. Every time we went to that store we couldn’t help but purchase something that we didn’t need. That store was so successful in persuading us because we probably spent more money there than any of their other customers. It got to a point where we had to verbally promise ourselves and each other to not buy anything more than what we needed before we walked into the store, but our efforts were futile. I’m sure that if we walked into that store today we would probably buy something that we don’t need because of the way it triggers our positive emotions and memories about fishing through their smells and sounds.

            Since my last blog review I have continued to explore the Law of Obligation, but I haven’t gotten the opportunity to use it in a selfless way yet. As Kurt W. Mortensen explains, “The Law of Obligation, also known as pregiving or reciprocity, states that, when others do something for us, we feel a strong need, or urge, to return the favor” (Mortensen 82). I have been using this law the same ways since my previous blog entry. That is, I still use it on my friends and family to gain something from them for my own personal benefit. I genuinely hope that I’m able to break that trend and work towards being more selfless through this law. I know this law can be applied in the ways in which I aspire to use it, so I will continue to put in the effort to explore different situations and test my ability to use this law for the benefit of others.